Are You Eatin, Sleepin, Dreamin with that One Thing On Your Mind??

2008-01-13T08:16:00.000-08:00

SURPRISE!!!

Does anyone even remember me?? Well I'm back..and starting a new blog so..please check it out. This one is old and retired........

New blog:

www.nascarhottie.blogspot.com

2007-03-13T07:06:00.000-07:00

"The combination of my 1st Cheat meal and an awesome 1st date are EXTREMELY POWERFUL in raising my mood and spirits!!"

(Since Katie said "do tell more" after reading this on my list last post....I guess I will! :)

March 3rd was a day unlike any other!! (hehe) It started off pretty much same-o, same-o....but instantly changed the minute I spoke to my Trainer. He actually OFFERED ME my 1st CHEAT MEAL!!! woooooooooo-hoooooo!!

I almost couldnt believe what I was hearing! I had been up all nite dreaming about a big juicy STEAK, a baked potato & hot fresh buttered bread....and OMG-thats EXACTLY what he SUGGESTED I have!! (Double OMG!!) (the power of THE SECRET worked once again!!) I literally started running around the house, skipping like a lil kid & singing "I get a steak tonighttttttttttttt...I get a steak tonightttttttttttt!" Yeah my family REALLY thought I had lost it by this point.

So....even more unbelievable then me being "given" a cheat meal--I had the BEST first date EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!! We went to the Buckhorn in Winters and the steak just melted in my mouth. It.....was....AMAZING!! I was so proud of myself-all I had was 1/2 of my steak (bout 6 oz), 3 green beans, 1/2 bowl of cream of mushroom soup & ONE BITE of Chris' cheesecake. No bread...no potato...and I was completely satisfied! Whodda thought it was possible?! hehe

Ok..enough about my food (can you tell Im just a "lil bit" food obsessed lately?)

The date went absolutely PERFECT! We have soooo many things in common that its almost kinda "Twilight Zone-ish".

And that first date has CONTINUED for the last 10 days.........!!!

2007-03-03T10:17:00.000-08:00

Things Ive Learned This Week.........
(Actually LAST week...but Im just now catchin up!)

This week has been a complete learning experience. Good and bad, but at least KNOWLEDGE IS POWER.

Heres a few:
1. When Im stickin to a SQUEAKY CLEAN diet of 1300 calories a day, I can NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES miss a meal, snack or mis-time my food!!

2. When I do blow it and dont eat enough Im am COMPLETELY PSYCHOTIC!!

3. I can laugh and cry at the exact same time..for no REAL reason.

4. When I stick to something long enough (my new program) my family actually becomes SUPPORTIVE of my efforts!

5. Im stronger than I ever thought I was.

6. When you change your MINDSET..you change EVERYTHING!!!

7. I can be around all my favorite foods and NOT GIVE IN to them!!

8. I REALLY REALLY miss eating BEEF!!

9. Im HAPPY to be back in California.

10. The combination of my 1st Cheat meal and an awesome 1st date are EXTREMELY POWERFUL in raising my mood and spirits!!

2007-02-28T21:17:00.000-08:00

Why Am I SOOOOO Mean??!

Im not sure whats goin on with me...but I am mean as hell lately! I used to think my PMS was bad...but this makes my PMS mood swings look like childs play. Should I even get started on how I can NOT remember ANYTHING the last few days?? Im forgettin passwords, directions, have even gone to the store & wandered around aimlessly becuz I cant remember for the life of me what I was supposed to buy. WTH? Someone said its the whole low carb thing, but I think it might be becuz I didnt eat enough yesterday & I havent been sleepin well either. Its takin its toll on me and unfortunately on everyone around me too. (Im SORRY!)

OK so....I was already completely on edge this afternoon, then my stupid ass dog Rodeo ate my WHOLE PLATE of Asparagus!! I just broke down & started CRYING when I saw the empty plate--WTH?! I dont care what you do...but Ill be damned if ya steal my food and get away with it..... (Yessss....shes still in "doggie-jail" as I type!)

My workouts are going FANTASTIC!! Im sooooo loving my training & eating so SQUEAKY clean...but lemme tell ya-this aint no joke. I have NEVER EVER worked out this hard in my life. But I LOVE LOVE LOVE iT!

Hopefully Ill get used to walkin funny soon too...this DOMS is KILLER!!

2007-02-28T20:57:00.000-08:00

I'm Back!!

Wow...its been FOREVER since Ive blogged but nows the time to get back in the groove!

So much has happened in the last few months..., Im back in CALI, tryin to re-adjust to bein back in my old hometown & have completely focused on rediscovering ME!! Im also SINGLE once again..(which isnt a bad thing, but I gotta figure out what Im gunna do about a Roomie for the Cruise now)

Ive made some MAJOR changes in my program & training and Im finally taking my body, mind and life to a whole new level. Why oh WHY did I wait so long?? My new program totally kicks @ss & Im seeing & feeling results faster than ever before!

On the Homefront: Blake is BACK IN SCHOOL!! Im so dang proud of him.
Vince is recovering AMAZINGLY & was released from the hospital last week...hes even WALKING!! Its a true miracle considering he still has THREE bullets left in his body...

Its been a rough 2 months but, I ALWAYS remind myself that even As bad as things seemed when I lost my job & apt. in AZ....things ALWAYS HAPPEN FOR A REASON.

Im exactly where Im supposed to be and I thank God above for his Guidance.

2006-11-27T17:46:00.000-08:00

Heres The HAPS:

Figured since Im FINALLY online,I might as well post an "update" of whats been happening in my life the last lil' while.

I just got back from CA yesterday morning. Spent 4 days with my family for Thanksgiving, which went OK. Unfortunately on Thanksgiving Day my Uncle Clois had a heart attack. He used to live right across the street from me back home & he works w/my parents at the Office, so we're real close. Hes doing pretty good..considering. They did angioplasty (sp?) sometime late Friday night & he seems to be recovering fairly well. Please keep him in your prayers.

Blake, his best friend Vince, my 2 brothers & my Dad all left early Friday morning to go way up North to work on some of the houses that my Dad is "flipping". Im so happy that Blake is finally doing something POSITIVE...and has something to keep him busy. Theyll be up there for a week..and if things go as planned-Blake will be in CA until after New Years. (not really sure though-hes been tryin to play "hardball" with me again-now all of a sudden he wants to be in AZ) Im so tired of it.

This thursday (only 3 days away!) Im flyin out to BALTIMORE to see Jim, Kathy & Scott! It was kinda a last minute decision-but airfare drpped like CRAZY (OMG-down to $95 ROUNDTRIP!!) so I couldnt pass it up!! Ill be out there for 4 days-Im excited. Unfortunately NOT EXCITED ENOUGH to keep me from cheating with my BFL program. WTF??!!

Yesterday I seriuously ate myself into OBLIVION. I havent done that in quite a while-it sucks and man- oh- mannnnnnnnnnn was I sick this morning!! I have a serious PROBLEM. Soemtimes I think I have a handle on it-then theres times like yesterday that Im completley OUT OF CONTROL. Wish I still had insurance so I could go see a "Professional" again-maybe that would help....I dunno....

OK>..sorry Im ramblin!

Today Ive been on track-heres so far:

#1- 2 scoops Syntrax Nectar w/2 C low cal OJ
#2-1/2 C LF CC & 6oz Light N Fit yogurt
#3-6 oz boiled chicken breast, 4 C green salad w/2T ranch & 2T lo-cal Vinegrette, small sweet potato

Ive been tryin to catch up on everyones blogs/Challenge reports....I SOOOO wish I could afford a trainer. I NEED to take EVERYTHING to a new level-Ive been so STUCK for a few months now. Any suggestions...IM open for um yall!

2006-11-27T17:18:00.000-08:00

OK..I FINALLY write a new entry..and Blogger wasnt working!!!

Yup.....I was tryin to catch up on here right before Thanksgiving-wrote a whole loota stuff, added pics..then BAM!! Get a notice that Blogger is down & NOTHING can be saved! UGGHH!!!

Oh well........Basically it was all about the NASCAR Weekend here in Phoenix hanging out w/Dede & her Hubby Jim--we had SUCHA BLAST!!

Friday we spent almost the entire 14 hours that we were at the track down in the Pits! Got to meet a few drivers-seen my crush Elliott (and Yes-he DID wave to me -in case you were wonderin!) Got to see his Brother Hermie down there too and he immediatly recognized me & said Hi. (That whole situation is pretty funny--too bad I cant get that kind of attention from ELLIOTT!) I watched the race from the Pits-and even got to go into VICTORY LANE for the after-race Celebration!

Saturday started off with us hanging out w/Cap'n MORGAN a lil tooooo early in the day!! Nuthin like a rum & coke at 8am huh?! hahaha The ol' Capn led to a lil flirtin on my part-and an invitation into the Pit Box with some cute guy from the #42 team. NOOOOO....I didnt take him up on it--(I have a BF that I really care about.) #42-guy asked me out for Sat night too-which I also didnt accept-and good thing....Mr.#42 Guy is MARRIED!! Yup-hes a lyin, cheatin, man-hoe. Figures.

Oh well..theres ALOT more that happened that weekend-but overall it was just me hanging out w/Dede & Jim and laughing more than I have in YEARS!! I had soo much fun, we met soo many people & just enjoyed the hot weather & friendship.

The sad part-I got so spoiled hanging out w/them for 3.5 whole days-as soon as they left...depression started kickin my ass-It was so nice to actually have FRIENDS to do stuff with. Dont think I realized how LONELY it is here in AZ....
Oh well...Until next time!

2006-10-10T12:21:00.000-07:00

This is for my Girl Dede!!!

Happy Birthday Jr!!

2006-10-10T03:24:00.000-07:00

Welcome To The Neighborhood...Now Pack Your Sh*t Up & Move The F*ck OUT!!!!

In case ya cant tell-I have new Neighbors in the Apt right below me. And YESSSSSS, they are the reason that Im sittin here at THREE-FRICKIN-TWENTY IN THE MORNING posting on my blog and not drifting off into Dreamsville. THE BASTARDS!! Dont they know I NEED my beauty sleep..Shhhheeeez-louise!!

They moved in IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 9 nights ago. Now tell me who in the hell moves at 1:30 AM?? Moving OUT-yeah maybeeeee...if youre tryin to make a slick fast get-away (like my old neighbors did so they didnt hafta pay for the damages they did-to that EXACT same apt!)

Anyways..back to my LOVELY new neighbors--the 2nd night they lived here, I was woke up by a HUGE BRAWL goin on in their Apt. Girls..guys....doors being kicked in, bodies slammin into walls--the Works, all at 3:15 in the frickin morning. It got CRAZY!! Im serious I thought I was gunna hear a gun go off at any moment! By the time I called the Cops-dispatch said they were already arriving on scene. More craziness... cops, paramedics, blah-blah-blah...
Bottom line-the dumb bitches that live there keep goin back to their abusive men....

Well about an hour ago..."IT" happened.........I was woke up by SIX GUNSHOTS!!!! All in the Apt right below my BED!!
Yep....courtesy of my f*cked up new neighbors.

Im sittin here tryin to compose myself-but I cant stop shaking. Im not even sure WHAT happened yet--the Police are outside, but Im too scared to go out there & be nosey, even though I SOOOO badly want to. I snuck out for about 30 seconds & whispered to my "Good" neighbor (she snuck out too) but she didnt know what was goin on either(she just made the "hand-signal/getsure" of a gun, & pointed to the apt right below mine. All we could see from the balconey area was the flashing lights & hear lots of crying. Stupid ass Bitches. I did catch one chick saying "I dunno...I just invited 2 of my friends over...."
Ummm HELLLLOOOOOOOOO?? Stuuuuupid biiiiiiiiitch..are you listening??? GET NEW FRIENDS YOU DUMBASS!!! And dont bring your loser-women-beating-cant-handle-their-alcohol-gun-shooting-punk-ass-friends into MY Nieghborhood!!!

Ok....sorry yall for the RANT, but Im freaked out right now!!

2006-10-04T18:57:00.000-07:00

Lets see if this will work-my pix disappeared on my last post!

My CRUSH smiling at me!! (Isnt he HOTT?!)

Signing autographs

Me and Mrs Sadler

Dale Jarrett!!

Hermie!!

The car he used to drive-(CANDYMAN!!)

2006-10-04T17:48:00.000-07:00

Even though this was almost a Month ago...

Ya didnt think I could REALLY go without puttin up some pics & an entry from Elliotts BBQ did ya??!

We had the BEST time-I still cant believe that Elliott, Hermie (his brother who is also a NASCAR driver) & his parents opened their Ranch and homes to us. It was soooo cozy-more like a family reunion than anything else. Unbelievable! Im not sure how many acres they have-but its absolutely gorgeous property. Elliott has a beautiful new house on one side, his Parents' house is towards the front of the property and Hermie has a home on the other side. They decorated the barn, set up a lil stage and had 2 huge BBQ's fired up cooking Bologna Burgers!

Blake Shelton showed up (him & Elliott are really good friends) and he played an hour & 1/2 concert-just him, his guitar & his bass player. It was amazing! NASCAR LEGEND Dale Jarrett showed up too...to surprise everyone. I got to talk to him & take a pic with him--I was totally stoked! I only got to talk to my Crush Elliott for a few minutes, but we all hung out watchin the concert..and ya know I couldnt keep my eyes off of him. Yummmmmmmmmmmm!!

Lets see.. what else-he has 29 Hunting dogs right now, we got to check them all out, and bein the dog-lover that I am..you know I really enjoyed it. Oh yeah...yall know I had to "suck up" to Mrs Sadler right??! Shes really sweet..I had to thank her for sucha amazing time. She couldnt believ we traveled all the way from CA & AZ--and she invited us back to take a tour of the town. (itll only take about 10 min according to her!) hehe We played with Hermies daughters, and the new puppies, talked to Elliotts sister for a while. Everyone was really nice (except for Hermies wife) But oh well.....
Im sure Im forgettin somethin....

Heres a few pics:

2006-09-30T08:31:00.000-07:00

Gracie is Home & Recovering!!

Yup..my Baby is back in my lap, curled up in her pink Blanket. Im sooooo HAPPY! Thanks everyone for your thoughts and prayers!

2006-09-26T18:03:00.000-07:00

Heartbroken, sad, relieved, disappointed...and wanting to Self-Medicate with FOOD...

Im not even sure how I can be feeling SOOO many feelings-all at once, but I am.

I just watched my "Heart" (Blake) get on a plane to CA. I have been trying sooo fuckin hard all day to stay strong...to look at the POSITIVE points of him leaving, but when it came right down to the Moment-I CANT hold myself together....

I know I should be on the phone calling one of my BLENDS buddies, but honestly-I dont think I could really hold ANY kind of conversation right now. I'M.....JUST.....EMPTY.....

Its EASY to say (and ACT) like Im happy that he is outta my house/that I wont hafta deal with the stress hes been puttin me thru, and that I finally will have "Dana-Time" but damnnnnnnnn...Blake has been my ENTIRE LIFE ever since the day I found out I was pregnant almost 17 years ago. ....I feel like I have failed. I was always raised to belive that kids should be with their Moms-NO MATTER WHAT. Now...I dont even have my own son with me. WTF????!!

Sorry..I know this is kinda like a "broken record" for most of you-yall were right by my side the First time Blake decided he didnt want to live with me back in Feb., and have stuck thru this shit with me on & off ever since. THANK YOU....and Im sorry Im layin all this crap on yall again. I just dont know what else to do..........

This just plain fuckin sucks...............and Im soooooo tryin to fight the urge to eat everything in sight....

2006-09-24T10:12:00.000-07:00

My Big Trip...Part 2...

Sept 5th: I flew into Richmond VA , then drove to Maryland to stay with my awesome BFL Friends Kathy & Scott. What a beautiful drive! I couldnt believ how green everything was and the FORESTS are EVERYWHERE!! OMG-TREES!! We dont have very many trees in Phoenix and YES...I get excited by the lil' things (as you can tell!)

Being the dork that I am, on the drive..I got SOOOOO excited by seeing the Pentagon & the Washington Monument that I almost crashed the rental car!! I have never been very good w/Geography so I had NO IDEA I was going to drive thru DC, until I came around a corner and BAMMMM!! There it was!! I called my brother-talkin 100 mph..tellin him how beautiful it was. (Yeah...he thought I was crazy too)

When I got to Kathy & Scotts, they showed me around their GORGEOUS house. (It looks like something straight out of a Interior Decroating Magazine!) and we stayed up till after midnite just talkin & catchin up. Good times!

The next morning-up bright & early (especially considering the time change), did 30+ minutes on the Dreadmill, then off to Baltimore with Kathy as my Tour Guide.

Baltimore: We hung out at the Baltimore Harbor, did a lil souvernoir shopping, took the Ferry ride across the Harbor and just really enjoyed having "GIRL TIME". We found a cute lil restaraunt right on the water and I had my first taste of Maryland Crab soup and Cream of Crab Soup-OMG....DELICIOUS!! Driving back-we went right past CAMDEN YARD. Its a ballpark I have ALWAYS wanted to go to. (Well...ever since I was dating Geronimo and he got traded to the Orioles!) I would love to go back and watch a game there someday.

Later that afternoon, Kathy drove me out to Pennsylvania ...so I could SEE THE AMISH!! Wow-what a trip!! Like I said in my earlier post-we dont have Amish folks out here in my neck of the woods. It completely FASCINATED me!! I was all excited-I know Kathy was really thinkin I was crazy at this point! It just blows my mind that people still LIVE and function like that in 2006. Its AMAZING. I was lucky enough to get ONE pic of a horse & Buggy (I think thats what they call um). It was ON THE HIGHWAY!!

Dang...I never thought I would say this-but Ive lead a sheltered life growing up in the fast pace of CALI!! The things I have never seen before!!

We ended the day with a DELECTABLE CRAB FEAST of steamed Maryland Crabs. Double OMG!! I have NEVER tasted crab like that EVERRRRRR! We just covered the entire table in newspaper, busted up crabs and ate until we were stuffed. It was sooo frickin delicious. Just all the crab you could ever want and some iced tea-MMmmm-MMMMMM!! Oh yeah...and to make it even BETTER-a good friend of Kathy & Scotts (Jim) joined us for dinner. Hes pretty dang HOT!!! He was really sweet, we all had alot of fun, stayed up till after midnite talkin. Doesnt get much better than that!

2006-09-21T18:30:00.000-07:00

Disneyland Pics....FINALLY!!

Since I couldnt get them to load with my blog entry....I gotta put um separate....

Me N Lightening Mcqueen..this pic for my Nephew TYLER!!

Cap'n Jack Me having dinner at ESPN Zone....this place is toooo cool!
Ok..so when I FLEXED..he REFUSED to take a pic with me!! (I think my GUNS were bigger than his-hehehe!)

2006-09-21T08:07:00.000-07:00

WTH??!! Where do my pics keep disappearing to??

I have uploaded my pics from Disneyland and some other pics from my trip at LEAST 9 TIMES now..it takes forever...I ghet the "done" window..then POOF!! They never show up. WTH?!

Im so frustrated with Blogger right now...hell I have been for like 5 days now. Ive tried using Photobucket, etc but the same thing is happening. Any suggestions?? (BTW..right before I had this problem, the Tony Stewart pics loaded with NO problems at all.

2006-09-16T20:04:00.000-07:00

September 1st-DISNEYLAND!!

The 2nd day of my L.A. Trip. I spent about 14+ hours at Disneyland and Disney California. I had a BLAST!! At 1st I felt a lil funny about going there by myself, but OMG!! I had soooo much fun!! No waitin for anyone, just running from ride-to-ride, getting to fly thru the lines on the major/big rides by going thru the "singles" line and overall actin like a kid all day and all night. It was actually VERY empowering for me. I am PROUD of myself that I can go places by myself and have a good time. Sometimes I think/feel like Im re-living my Childhood...which is kinda weird 'cuz I had a good childhood for the most part. Oh well...its FUN!!

Ive always loved "Its a Small World", and going thru there brought back so many memories of when I was a little girl and HAPPY as could be, going to Disneyland for the 1st time. It was my lil fantasty-place...filled with everything "girlie" that I could imagine-pink EVERYWHERE and singing & dancing dolls. I still LOVE it! Cant help but feel happy when I hear that song. (I know it can be a lil annoying too though!)

Pirates of the Carribeann was AWESOME!! Its even better now that they have added HOTTT Cap'n JACK SPARROW into it in THREE different scenes! The likeness to The real Capn Jack is CRAZY-REAL!! Yummmm! The lil Hottie that walks around Disneyland playin Cap'n Jack is pretty hot too. He definately has the mannerisms, walk and talk down to a tee. I sooo wanted to take a pic with him, but once again-I was told "you can take pics OF him, but not WITH him!" Damnnnnn....Im startin to get a COMPLEX!! No one will let me take pics with them!! hehehe
Oh yeah..and I bought a Cap'n Jack WIG!! It was funny-when I tried it on a few people in the store thought it was my REAL hair!! (It looks really cute on me--but even better on Blake!!) And...Of course I had to be "ghetto" and take pics of me w/the Mickey ears on in the store--'cuz Im too cheap to buy a pair.

I went to Downtown Disney for dinner-to the ESPN Zone. What a cool-ass place!! I ate my dinner while sitting in a huge leather recliner right in front of a movie-theater sized TV that was playin the Baseball game ..and it was surrounded by 12 different smaller TV's..one of which was playin a NASCAR race, so ya know I was LOVIN it!!

Went back to Disneyland until I got "kicked out" sometime after midnight. What a fun and empowering day!!

2006-09-16T19:30:00.000-07:00

August 31st...Tony Stewart Meet-N-Greet....

Ok..Im FINALLY gettin around to my trip recaps!

I was SOOOOO Lookin forward to finally gettin to meet HOTTIE Tony Stewart, but I gotta say..it was kinda disappointing. Im not into gettin autographs...never have been-they dont do anything for me, but I do LOVE to take pics with people and thats all I really wanted.

After waitin about 45 minutes to meet him, his PR people SUCK. They wouldnt let ANYONE take pics WITH him....just OF him. I got to talk to him for a few minutes..I absolutely LOVE his smart-ass sense of humor and he joked around with me. Hes adorable in person....

I was blessed with meeting a family from Washington State that was in line right behind me. The Tony Stewart Foundation had flown the family into L.A. for their sons Make-a-wish Wish to come true. They were an amazing family. The lil boy Conner was adorable. He had his haircut "special" to meet Tony...with a big #20 in the back. His lil brother Cayden was my new best friend when he found out I was an Elliott Sadler Fan! I promised to send the boys pics from Elliotts BBQ. I really do feel honored to have met them.

2006-09-12T07:25:00.000-07:00

I'm Back!! Day-by-Day Recaps to Follow...

I have SOOOOO much to write about/journal so Im thinkin Ill do a day-by-day "journal" so I can actually remember how FABULOUS my last week & 1/2 have been!! I have taken alot of vacations, but this one BY FAR blows everything else outta the water! (I hate to admit this...but even the BFL Cruise cant touch it-and thats saying ALOT!!)

I know..yall think its cuz I got to spend a whole day/evening at the one and only ELLIOTT's house/ranch...but thats not it. This trip was so DIVERSE. I hit one end of the culture spectrum to the other, all in just a few days time.

Quick summary:
Thursday August 31st-Drove to L.A. Got to meet TONY STEWART (hes HOTT) & met a fabulous family that was there on their sons "Make a wish" Wish trip.
Friday Sept. 1st-Spent the whole day (14+ hours) at Disneyland, just hanging out by myself, taking pics, running from ride-to-ride and having a BLAST!!
Saturday Sept 2nd-Some sightseeing in the LA Area, then headed home
Tuesday Sept 5th-Flew into Richmond VA, drove up to Maryland to stay with Kathy & Scott (my great friends I met on the BFL Cruise!). We sat up until Midnite talkin/catchin up & laughing.
Wednesday Sept 6th-Kathy took me into Baltimore. We spent the morning/early afternoon at Baltimore Harbor, (lots to write about later), then ...she took me into Pennsylvania & I SEEN AMISH PEOPLE!! (Ok..Im from Cali-we dont have Amish in our "neck of the woods".) Topped the night off with a CRAB FEAST of steamed Maryland Crabs, and met a HOTTIE (a good friend of Kathy & Scotts) to boot! Dont git much better than that!
Thursday Sept 7th-Shirley flew in to meet up with me and then it was time for Elliotts BBQ!! I need LOTS of time to write about this!! Lets just say-UNBELIEVABLE!! (And NOOOOOOOO I didnt git any "hook-up" ---I know that what yall are wondering!!)
Friday Sept 8th-14 hours at the Track, Baby!! Unforgettable day at the races. Pit passes, TV Tapings, hot boys all around!
Saturday Sept 9th-RACE DAY!!!
Sunday Sept. 10th-Drove into Washington DC, went to/seen the White House, Washington Monument, Pentagon, Quantico FBI Academy (Shirleys Dad graduated from there-too cool), and spent a couple hours at Arlington Cemetary. Arlington was such an emotional experience to me-I will NEVER Forget the feeling that came over me while witnessing the Changing of the Guards at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. God Bless our Troops!! The impact of the whole DC Experience was intensified by it being the day before 9-11....

OK....so my "quick review" wasnt very quick! So...you can probably only imagine how much I really have to write about!! Oh yeah..then theres the 383 Pictures I took! By the way Dede...only about 297 of them are of Elliott!!! hahahahahahaha!!!!

2006-08-30T07:07:00.000-07:00

FINALLY!! (It let me upload pics!)

Blend Meet Up w/ Mtn Juniper!!

Me & Kristin at the Pink Taco

This has got to be the COOLEST booth EVER in a restaraunt!! Its a semi-circle, the walls are at least 20 feet high and these crosses are HUGE! Next time we go there-I wanna sit under the crosses

Even though I only got to spend a couple hours with Kristin...it was FANTASTIC!! I cant say enough about her-shes beautiful, thoughtful, caring, funny, open & honest, and a shining example of a SURVIVOR!! Thanks again Girly for spending the afternoon with me!! It means more to me than you can imagine!!

2006-08-29T07:27:00.000-07:00

Bloggers Not Cooperating...

Ive been trying to post about my FANTASTIC MeetUp with Kristin (MtnJuniper) ever since Sunday afternoon & post our pics...but I keep gettin booted. :(

Ok...will hafta post about that later.

Also..I really wanted to put sumthin new up & quit seeing my "Pity-Party" post from Saturday.

Today is the 1st day that Im feeling like Im heading back into ther "normal-zone" again..and Im soooo excited!! This "low" has been kickin my ass..

Thank you Everyone for hangin in there WITH me and FOR me when I get into my "episodes". It means the world to me.

2006-08-26T08:09:00.000-07:00

Could Someone Just SHOOT Me & Put Me Out of my @$#%^&** Misery??!!

PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZE???!!

Yeahhhh I'm f*ckin WHINING ..and COMPLAINING....and BITCHIN' !!!! But I have a damn GOOD reason-I just cant take these cramps & my %^%##%&& period anymore right now!!!

One or 2 days..I can live with, but c'mon this shit has been kickin my ass & had me down-f0r-the-count for almost SIX days!! WTF??!!

Im startin to get worried, I havent had problems like this/symptoms this severe in probably over a year. I literally have been doubled over in pain, curled up in the fetal position with a heating pad for the last 3 days. You can even SEE the pain in my eyes (well you can if you can get past the FIVE huge zits covering my face) It sounds crazy but when I get to this point it affects EVERY aspect of my life. I swear if it doesnt stop soon-Im gunna end up in jail for f*ckin killin someone during one of my fits of RAGE!! UURRGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Damnnnnn I NEED medical insurance........
And a damn good Defense Attorney.........

2006-08-24T07:42:00.000-07:00

Monsoon Season-YIKES!!

Its one of those RARE mornings here in the Valley of the Sun. No Sunshine, just house-rattling Thunder, clouds and now its raining so hard I literally can't see the building next door.
Yep...it's MONSOON TIME!

No one ever told me about monsoons BEFORE I moved to AZ. If they had-I might have thought twice about living here becuz I HATE storms, thunder & lightening (unless I am very far away from it).
Growing up in the North Bay, we might get one or two thunderstorms a year but nuthin like this. This is CRAZY!! Last year (my 1st Monsoon Season) I freaked out--I was SO unprepared! Every single day around 5pm or so (always seemed to happen around rush hour) an alert (yall know the Emergency Broadcast System alerts?) would come across the TV and advise everyone to stay inside because of the Monsoons & alert us to where the flash floods were. Flash floods in the desert..sumthin I never thought Id hafta worry about! Hell..just the sound of that stupid Alert System going off and it NOT being a "test" makes my heart beat faster & gets me nervous.

This year has been unbelievably tame, at least here in my area. Last year our complex lost over 25 Huge trees in less than 3 months from the winds, & storms. It seemed like everytime I took Rocky out for a walk-there was another tree that had been ripped from the soil. One storm last year even ripped the carport cover (Metal pole and all) RIGHT OUT OF THE CEMENT! (And crushed 4 of my neighbors cars in the process) Scary stuff!

2006-08-23T17:15:00.000-07:00

Pictures That Make Me SMILE.........

I found these when I was cleanin up some files on the computer & just had to share them!! Hope they make ya'll SMILE too!!

This Pic of Blake was taken in ATL in Dec. It was a great trip, and I LOVE that you can still see that "Lil' Boy" Grin in him.

Blake, His Great Grandpa & his Dad. Taken Easter this year....it was the 1st time Blake ever got to meet his Great Grandpa...and the 1st time we ever spent a Holiday together as a Family. (Can U see the family resemblance or what?!)

My spoiled Little GRACIE, her 1st night in our Home. I knew when she fell asleep like this on my lap that she trusted me. Awwhhhhhhhhhh.......

One of my favorite pics of my Baby ROCKY. Everytime I see this pic I smile--this was "SOOOOO HIM". All cuddled up under the blankets with just his cute lil nose stickin out.
Me -N-Miss CLeo. Taken "back in da' Day" right before I left for work. (Damnnn I was Cute in my uniform huh? hehe)

2006-08-19T08:48:00.000-07:00

HOTTIE's Got A Brand New RIDE....

Dang...didnt think Elliott could look much HOTTER than he already did, but LEMME TELL YA ..now that he's in my fave colors (red & Black) and drivin a DODGE...OMG!!

Theres only ONE Dodge he would look even HOTTER in......

MINE!!!!!

2006-08-18T08:10:00.000-07:00

Official Challenge...6 1/2 Weeks IN.....

2006-08-16T20:36:00.000-07:00

ME??..... OVERTRAINING???!!

As UNBELIEVABLE as it sounds to me, the more I'm looking into the "Signs of Overtraining" I think I might be over-doing it.

I am SOOOO exhausted, not only Physically but mentally lately that I cant even get my day-to-day activities done. WTH?? Been having "mini-breakdowns" for the last few days, then reading back on my blog-the exhaustion has actually been goin on for almost TEN DAYS. No wonder I feel like shit. Today was the 1st day in a LOONG LONG time that I TRULY questioned just WHY am I trying so hard to get into shape & get a hard-body. ..and if all this effort is even worth it. That kind of thinkin is just plain crazy becuz I KNOW its all worth it. I will NEVER go back to "That" Dana I was a couple years ago. I didnt even know who "SHE" was, but I hated her.

Anyways, tryin to get a handle on things, a few folks from MyBlends mentioned the classic signs of Overtraining & Ive been doin a lil research tonite. (In between naps & CRYING SPELLS)
Heres what I found:
SIGNS OF OVERTRAINING:**(and what Im seeing in myself)

1. DECREASED PERFORMANCE
Slower reaction times, reduced speeds and lowered endurance are all common signs of overtraining.
(**Even though I am hitting a new High Point on my HIIT run, my overall mile/avg time increased from 12:00 min/mile to 12:15 min/mile this past week)

2. AGITATION, MOODINESS, IRRATABILITY, OR LACK OF CONCENTRATION
Too much exercise and too little rest can wreak havoc on the hormones, cause mood swings and create an inability to concentrate.
(**Im like a walkin time bomb lately-just Im not sure if Im gunna cuss someone out, start laughing uncontrollably or burst into tears at any given moment. Even at work the tasks that normally take me an hour are taking about double that)

3. EXCESSIVE FATIGUE AND MALAISE
A body that never has a chance to recover from a previous workout will continue to feel more and more fatigued. Some people describe this as "heavy legs."
(**"Heavy Legs" is the PERFECT description. Tonight I took Gracie out and I swear it took EVERY last ounce of energy I had just to walk around the complex & back up the stairs. My whole body is DRAGGING. Even my HAIR is TIRED!)

4. INCREASED PERCEIVED EFFORT DURING NORMAL WORKOUTS
Overtraining takes its toll on the body, and workouts that were once a breeze can begin to feel like a grind.
(**Im used to "GLOWING" w/ energy during my workouts, but theres been twice in the past week that I have actaully CRIED in the middle of it instead. Takes everything to get thru my lifting-which I normally LOVE to do)

5. CHRONIC OR NAGGING MUSCLE ACHES OR JOINT PAIN
Overused muscles and joints can cause constant aches, which may go unnoticed until the body is given proper rest.

6. MORE FREQUENT ILLNESSES AND UPPER RESPIRATORY INFECTIONS
Too much exercise taxes all of the body's systems and makes it more difficult to ward off infections.
(**hmmm...could this be why Ive had a sore throat & cold for a week now?)

7. INSOMNIA OR RESTLESS SLEEP
During sleep the body has time to rest and repair itself. An overtrained body, however, is sometimes unable to slow down and completely relax, making it difficult to recover between workouts.
(**As tired as I am-I cant sleep for more than about 2 hrs at atime. My body just never "settles down" & hasnt for over a week now)

8. LOSS OF APPETITE
Overtraining can cause an increase in hormones such as epinephrine and norepinephrine that tend to inhibit appetite. The physical exhaustion and anxiety that often occur with overtraining can also have the same effect.
(**Really havent felt like eating for almost 2 weeks-except my "almost-binge" 2 days ago. Thats why Im loving the SYNTRAX NECTAR so very much-I am getting my protein & calories WITHOUT HAVING TO EAT)

9. CHRONICALLY ELEVATED HEART RATE AT REST AND DURING EXERCISE
A clear sign of an overworked heart muscle is a chronically elevated heart rate. Also, people who overtrain will often find that it takes longer for their heart rate to return to normal after a workout.

10. MENSTRUAL CYCLE DISTURBANCES IN WOMEN
Exercising excessively and not consuming enough calories may disrupt a woman's menstrual cycle. While some may experience irregular periods, other will stop menstruating altogether.
(**again-could be a coincidence, but Ive started my period THREE times in the past 3 weeks! WTF??!! I really doubt this is the reason though becuz I think this applies to chicks that have very LOW bodyfat %'s & mine is still way up there.)

2006-08-15T16:58:00.000-07:00

Disaster AVERTED (Thanks to Jen & Bubblz!)...

What would I do without my BFL Blends/Family?? Actually yesterday I would have BINGED BIGTIME!! Thank you soooo much Jen & Suzanne for "Talkin me off the Ledge" & gettin me thru my breakdown.

Not sure WHAT exactly triggered it...basically a combination of EXHAUSTION, & HUNGER (waited way too long between meals) I think, ...but it was BADDDDDD!!

For those of you who have Toddlers-ya know how they get when they are over tired & EVERYTHING is suddenly too much to handle? The crying, screaming...WHINING??!! Well... THAT WAS ME!

I think Jens experience as a Early Childhood Educator gave her the knowledge to deal with me, and Suzanne talked & texted me thru a walk, away from any harmful foods. YOU 2 ROCK!!

After a yummy BFL meal, and a 2 hr nap I was all ready to hit it hard again-went and did 62 min of extra cardio last night and ATE CLEAN!!

Thanks again Suzanne & Jen...and thanks Lisa Michele for callin & checkin on me Girl! I couldnt do this without ALL of my FRIENDS...Luv ya'll!!

2006-08-14T07:19:00.000-07:00

No More Sadness..Just Alot of "Stuff"...(And Boyz R Stupid...)

1st of all..let me start by saying THANK YOU to Everyone for their thoughts, prayers and hugs during my lil' Breakdown on Saturday. All the love & support helped me get thru a really rough day. An extra special thanks to LisaMichele & Bubblz for the phone calls!!

All in all-I am pretty proud of the way I handled Sat. Got in a really hard-core workout(UBWO) & even did an extra 30 min on the recumbant bike to help deal with the anger & anxiety I was feeling. Then, was asked out by "Hottie" at the gym-(more on THAT under the Boyz R Stupid part). I treated myself to a mani & pedi later on. My lil' manicurist is DA BOMB! She spent 1 HOUR & 10 min on my feet & calves, another hour on my hands, forearms & biceps. I was so relaxed that I fell asleep 3-4 times. I sooo needed that -when I left I felt 100% better.

OK..."Boyz R Stupid" (Sorry Casey & Jim-Bo-not talkin about yall)
Hottie at the gym SHOCKED me by askin me "to spend the day together" Sat right after my workout. Girls....he is H-O-T. He competes in Natural BB competetions, is about 6'4", bald, VERY easy on the eyes! So..he gives me his #, says lets get together in an hour or so, yadda yadda yadda. I call him, leave him a msg...and NEVER HEAR BACK from him. WTF?? Whatever....Boyz R Stupid
Then theres "Mr.NFL"....hes been callin/textin me lately. I decided that seein him Sat night might NOT be sucha bad idea. Hell..its been like 2+ months since Ive seen him, and when I really think about it-I do miss him. Plus we always have so much fun when were together. And I do miss just talkin/spendin time together. Went to his place, chilled out in the "Theater Room" (damn I WISH I had one of those in MY house!) & had a really nice night. Boyz R still Stupid though-becuz everytime we see each other its the same old thing....he says he WANTS to spend more time with me, see me more often, wants me to travel with him, etc but reality is-- we see each other MAYBE every 2 months or so. Told ya..."Boyz R Stupid"
Oh yeah...then theres my Ex-Fiance'. Some Bio-tch that used to work w/ us told him Friday that i'm STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM!! Now thats a "TRUE WTF?!" Moment!! He has been callin my cell OFF THE HOOK for 3 days, leavin msgs about how we need to get back together. UGGHH!! NOT happenin Buddy! Once again.."Boyz R Stupid!"

Oh..GOTTA share this-yesterday I FINALLY broke my scale plateau!! Down F-O-U-R lbs!!

Lookin forward to a FANTASTIC week!

2006-08-12T08:46:00.000-07:00

MISS YOU Girl..............

She took this pic on Aug 7th, 1993 (5 days before she died) She had it shipped to my Parents as a surprise...it arrived on the day of her Funeral-which kinda freaked us all out, but I LOVE this pic.

My Tat-

Jenifers name encased by the Egyptian Ahnk (Symbol of eternal Life) & the Eye of Ra-(protection from evil).
I got this done a few days after we got a conviction in her case..it means THE WORLD to me. This is the main reason I want big, strong CUT Biceps. She is ALWAYS with me...

2006-08-11T21:58:00.000-07:00

Time to Face Reality....

Ive been tryin my best to avoid the fact....like thats gunna change anything....

Tomarrow will be 13 Years since my Lil' Sis/Best Friend JENIFER was murdered. I can't believe its been so long. But then again, Somedays it seems like it was just yesterday...while other days it seems like it was in another lifetime. In a way-it WAS another lifetime I guess. I have "My Life Part 1-WITH Jen" & then theres "My Life Part 2" which started on August 12, 1993.

Both Part 1 & Part 2 have had their ups & downs, but at least during Part 1-I ALWAYS had my Sister with me--NO MATTER WHAT. (When youre only 18 months apart in age, you get to be REALLY close.) Even when she was 3000 miles away in the Army, we talked at least 5-6 times a week,(if not daily) & wrote each other all the time. I was actually the very last person that spoke to her.(Besides the punk Mutha-F*ckers that killed her) She called me less than 3 HOURS before she was killed, and we set our plans to go on a Cruise together when she moved back home to CA in 2 weeks. Then...just like that...she was gone. Damn ...

I MISS HER SO MUCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

All week Ive been trying to be kind to myself, stay strong, take care of myself and hold the depression & sadness at bay, but I just cant do it right now. IT HURTS TOOO FUCKIN MUCH!!!!

2006-08-11T06:55:00.000-07:00

This N That Part II......

Can ya believe its Friday already?? This week has kinda flown by. It started out ROUGH (battling insomnia for 3 days, my "jean-shopping MELT-DOWN", and just being T-I-R-E-D!) But its ending on a much better note. :)

My Program has been "ON" this week-Ive been eating clean EVERY single day, have hit new high points on the Dreadmill (8.0 mph yesterday-wooohooo!), & have been tryin to push myself so hard in the gym that I actually STARTED CRYING during my last set of bicep reps. WTF?!

I wanna get ''In the ZONE" (im almost there!)& stay there until the Richmond trip. Im think Im bein realistic-while Im gone I will do my best to be BFL-strong, but I also know I am gunna be busy, Im gunna have a couple of drinks w/Shirley & not sure what kind of workout room the hotel will have. (Im stayin at 3 different hotels within a week-but Im gunna be goin to different areas & dont wanna drive too far each day.) Make sense? Im gettin so excited about the trip-but theres still ALOT of things I need to take care of. Gotta book the rental car, gotta get Blakes plane tickets to CA, need to find a hotel for the 1st 2 days Im there. Look into any local Golds Gym or LA Fitness, etc etc etc

Then theres the Terrorists Bullshit goin on-Hate to admit it...but its got me kinda freaked. Im not AFRAID to fly-and I truly belive that when my time comes, theres nothing I can do to stop it, but I just HATE that MY life is being affected by the crazy M-F'rs that wanna kill. Ok..Im not gunna get into all that. I know one thing-the Flight Attendants are gunna be sick of me asking for bottle after bottle of water on the flights since I cant take my own huge jug onboard. :)

My weekend agenda: (Boring)
*Clean this apt from top to bottom. Cant stand when things are out of place/messy & Ive been neglectin it all week. Not sure WHY I get like this-it makes it tougher on myself becuz when the house is dirty-my OCD acts up REALLY bad, starts leadin to depression & a vicious circle. Im puttin an end to THAT cycle TODAY after work!!
*Watch the Races-Busch on Sat & nextel Cup on Sunday. Hopin my man makes it past the THIRD lap this week!
*Wrap up all my travel plans
*Scrap book at least 3 pages(havent done ANY since I moved to AZ!)
*Tan
*Pedicure
*Take pics w/new camera

Yall can thank me now for puttin you to sleep w/my exciting (NOT!) life!!

2006-08-08T18:35:00.000-07:00

Mmmmmm-Mmmmmmm....

Yeah...I bet Snickers isnt the only thing in the pic that SATISFIES!!!!

2006-08-07T19:47:00.000-07:00

FREAK MAGNET!!

Why am I a FREAK MAGNET?! I swear, if theres a freaky/weird-ass guy anywhere within a 10 mile radius-they are drawn directly to me! (My close friends can vouch for me on this unfortunately!)
UUGGHHHHH!! What is it about me? PLEASE tell me so I CAN CHANGE!

I have a gorgeous, dear friend-that shall go un-named, (but lives VERY close to me) HINT-HINT! And we all know she has a tendency to be a "dork-magnet" when we go out, but at least the Dorks are pretty much goofy & harmless. They just like to try to get her attention & act all goofy-but shes beautiful so ya cant blame um. But with me....I gotta get the FREAKS! WTH?

My latest episode of freak-magnetism:

Early this morning, at the post office I was approached by an attractive older man (50-ish). He came up & commented on how much he loved my shoes & that he loved how tall they made me. (Cool-ya'll know how much I absolutley LOVE my 3-4 inch heels, & yeah-they make me about 6'2".) He walks away, only to come back all the way across the room a few mins later to tell me how how sexy & beautiful my FEET are. From there he started gettin all EXCITED about my tatoo on the inside of my ankle & then.....told me he wanted TO LICK IT!!!!!!!!

Thats right folks-this guy wants to LICK MY ANKLE TATOO!!! WTF??!!!

All of this BEFORE 8am! Waaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy toooo much for me-I RAN to my truck & didnt even mail my letter off.....

Am I EVER gunna attract a NORMAL guy? Heellpppppppppppppppp!!!!

2006-08-07T06:06:00.000-07:00

This N That....

Its Monday & I'm tryin my best to make it a good day-which has been a challenge in itself & its ONLY 6:00 AM!

Last night-couldnt sleep. I was really tired, went to bed kinda late & just layed there WIDE awake. URGGHH!!! Thought watchin "Flava Of Love" might put me to sleep but it was too gross/funny! Did anyone else see it? OMG-the one nasty/psycho/ghetto girl actually POOPED (yes you read that right!) on herself & the entire FLOOR OF THE MANSION!! Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Ok..enough nastiness...all in all I totaled about 3 hours of sleep-I need about 4 more to feel good. Nap time will be comin early today I hope.

Today I hafta go to COURT, for a stupid speeding ticket. Out here in Scottsdale they had the bright idea of putting the radar-cameras ON THE FREEWAY. WTF??? Its been a huge debate/fight ever since they started them, & we're the only place in the US that has them directly on a freeway, but dammitt-if I didnt get flashed!! Yeah-I was doin 77 in a 65 zone, but still...UGHHH. For any of yall that are in law enforcement youll understand why Im so mad: My drivers License has a "security block" on it. (Which means if I ever get stopped/pulled over & my DL is ran-it comes up saying "******* County Sheriffs Dept" for my address/contact info) Ive only been pulled over twice in 12 years, but both times was given "Professional Courtesy" and no ticket. Well the damn camera could care less about professional courtesy. So....now its TRAFFIC SCHOOL & $124 to get out of this one. Plus, goin in front of the judge today to get an extension so I can do the school. Hate goin to court, even after all the testifying I have done in the past.

Ok...enough of the "this" & onto the "That":
I bought a REAL camera yesterday!! The Kodak 6.1 MP C643. I LOVE IT!! So get ready to be bombarded with pics on here.
Our BFL Meetup went great on Sat night. There were 7 of us, had great food, great conversation & I came away motivated & excited about my Challenge.
I hafta thank JESS for the new site-Im already addicted to it! Its so nice to have a positive place to go.
NASCAR at the Brickyard yesterday was heart breaking. My man crashed in LAP#2!!! WTH?? Lap 2?? They usually dont even get up to full speed until Lap # 3! I wasnt even home from the gym yet when it happened, so I missed it. What can I say-Its been a rough year for my Cutie Pie....Good thing he's still HOT to look at!

2006-08-05T08:52:00.000-07:00

Its Soooo Good to be Home!!

I actually got back Wed around noon, but its taken me this long to catch up on lost sleep, and attempt to get back into my normal routine. Its CRAZY how a few days of a "so-called" vacation can take such a toll on me, my body & my health.

Dont get me wrong-I love goin back home to Cali. Seeing my family, Shirley & Cathy is the BEST part-very relaxin, just chill out & catch up on stuff. But when Im not with them, I am goin 100 MPH NON-STOP. Drivin back & forth to San Francisco w/Blake, tryin to fit in visiting everyone in a 3 day time frame, fit in my workouts, had the concert to go to-which was a 1.5 hrs drive each way. Theres just so much to do & not enough time. I always end up feeling guilty about it when I cant squeeze everything in. I need to work on that. I worry too much about what other people think..why is it that I feel I need to please everyone & that I want EVERYONE to like me?? Soo UNREALISTIC! (The 1st step is admitting I have a problem!)

Anyways, Im lovin bein back in AZ. Im a nerd-but I get so excited over the little things here-wakin up to a beautiful, sunny day (were experiencin a cold-front which means its been 99-102 the last 3 days which is FABULOUS!) Sittin here in my "bachelor-lookin apt." with Blake, Gracie & Rodeo..I am happy as a Lark!! (Im a dork-I know!) Even cleaning my house & getting everything back in order/where it belongs makes me happy. How SICK is that?! (Blame it on my OCD-I cant stand to have things out of place..it drives me INSANE!!)

Went to see Talledaga Nights yesterday-too funny, but it made me desperately wanna go to a race NOW!! Looks like I'll be goin to the Fontana Race on Sept 2nd!! Then, I leave for VA (my BIG trip!) on Sept 5th!! AWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

No time to lose-gotta step up my game w/BFL-Hit it hard & give it all and THEN SUM!!

Tonight we are having our first OFFICIAL BFL AZ MEETUP! Im sooooo excited!! Thank you Janel for puttin it all together-YOU SERIOUSLY ROCK!

2006-08-05T08:28:00.000-07:00

A Lil' Late....

But heres the Luau Pics. (Poor quality-but hey-its from my cell phone)

Me N my Beautiful Niece Destiny

Me N Pops ( I absolutley ADORE my Dad-Hes the BEST!!)

This is my Favorite "island Boy" Al & his Girlfriend...he is 70 yrs old, & the SWEETEST guy you will ever meet !
I know his GF doesnt look happy-but see really does like me too. (Im the only one she likes out of our whole club!)

Blake N Destiny.

2006-08-01T11:20:00.000-07:00

Truth Be told.......

Im Hot--AFTER 2 shots of Tequila & a shot of Jack Daniels!!! WAAAHHHHHHHHH!!

Dammitt..I wanna be Hot BEFORE the shots start flowing! Oh well......

Anyways-we had front row seats & the concert went good. As soon as me & Heidi got there Darryls Bus driver/merchandise guy Vincent came & gave me a hug, & talked to us for a while, which was cool. During the show, Darryl and the 2 guys in the band I had met on Wed all waved, ackowledged us, etc.

After the show, when I got to see Darryl the 1st thing he did was gime a big hug & a kiss on the cheek(dammitt!), told me how pretty I looked, that he was really happy I made it to the show, then went straight into an apology about how sorry he was if he had said anything "out of line" to me in Tucson. Shhiiiiitttt!! Out of line? I was LUVIN IT!! BBwhahahahahaaahahahah!!
Oh well...talk about burstin my bubble!! He said he got trashed that night, and it got really bad after I left. So there ya have it- I was HOT becuz he was DRINKIN!!
Ok..Im gunna go sit in the "loser" corner now.

Actually I ended up havin a really nice conversation with him, we talked about my Sister, compared tats, talked about BFL, & found out that we have a mutual friend DAVE (Jens Husband!) . He promised me that if me & Jen come to his show when we're in TN that he'll show us around. (He was born & raised there) Ya know if I do..Im bringin a whole DAMN BOTTLE of Tequila!! Bbwahahahahahahhaha!

Oh well...time to leave the country singers alone & go back to bein the True NASCAR Hooch that I am!!

2006-07-31T08:14:00.000-07:00

Alo-haaaaa!

The luau was a success, even though we only had about 225 people attend (we've had up to 400 in the past). The food was unbelievable (My Daddy, brother & my Uncle John did all the cooking). I sooo wished Marky-Mark & Janel coulda been there-Mark woulda LOVED the Kalua Pig, the Lomi-lomi & the Haupia! (Put Aloha kitchen to shame!) Me and my SIL made just under $900 in profits on the bar sales, and the floor show was the best we've had in a really long time.

It was awesome to see all my "Aunties & Uncles", cousins & the rest of my Island Family. On the most part-everyone was SHOCKED when they saw me & very complimentary, but of course..theres always the few BIOTCHES. (Didn't their Mommas ever teach them "If ya cant say nuthin nice-dont say anything"?!) Oh well....I just smiled, had a great time and enjoyed being around alot of friends and family.

As much as I love Arizona its times like this weekend that make me so unbelievably homesick. I tend to forget what its like to be around people who truly love you & care about you....until Im put in that situation, then it hits me like a ton of bricks.

OK....aint gunna end this on a sad note! Today its off to the gym w/Cathy-Girl (shes so kickin ass w/her BFL Challenge!), then Im FINALLY gettin my hair done by my cousin! YIPPEEEE!!!
After that, its time to get as cute as possible to go to the Darryl Worley concert! WOoooHooooo!!
Send me strength yall-Ill be at a county Fair with all the yummy, nasty greasy delicous fair food you can imagine! -JUST SAY NO DANA!-JUST SAY NOOOOO!!
Aloha!

2006-07-27T19:58:00.000-07:00

Me N Darryl....

Yeah...he looks a lil rough in last nights pic, so heres a couple other ones so yall can see how cute he really is.
(And yeah-youve all seen my top before-sorry..dont have any cute clothes!)

This was last Oct, sorry its so blurry-its a pic of a pic. Ewww...I am sooo fat in that pic!

2006-07-27T07:48:00.000-07:00

OMG!! Darryl Worley Thinks I'm HOT! AAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

(First..I hafta thank Shirley & Cathy for gettin me to go to the concert last night. I debated all day becuz of the crap at home, but they both reminded me how hard Ive been workin towards my goals and that I needed to "reward" myself w/ a night out. THANK YOU!!)

I had such a good time, and Darryl blew my mind when I finally got backstage to see him!
He told me I was beautiful, that he loved my curly hair, & asked if he could touch it. (Hell yeah..but only if you PULL IT hard! BBwhahahaha) No, I didnt say that but I WISH I woulda!
We had talked for a few min, then ..when I started to walk away he grabbed my hand, pulled me back, stared into my eyes and said " I hafta tell you-You have the sexiest, most gorgeous eyes I have ever seen. .. I know-cuz I was starin at 'um all night-I could just start kissin you right now when you look at me like that." I know-kinda cheesy, but Dayyummmm it sounded good at the time! Ive always liked Darryl ever since the 1st time I met him about 8 yrs ago, and hes NEVER said anything like that to me before so ya know I was about to MELT!

That led to a lil more converstaion (no smoochin!), and I found out that he is playin the county fair back home in CA on Monday..so guess what? Ill be there-another backstage pass in hand!!

A few min. later, 2 of the guys in the band came up to me and told me how beautiful I was, and that I better be right up front on Monday Night so they have something hot to look at. ( WHATEVER!) Its pretty hilarious to me. The guys are all cool though, and they rock the show-so Im lookin forward to it.

Before I left, Darryl gave me another hug and said "Dont forget-MONDAY! Im lookin forward to it...see ya then Dana"

I think thats when I officially melted. ( I know-Im a dork!!)

All in all..I had a great time, stayed 100% on track BFL wise and got a HUGE ego boost out of it. Not a bad night at all!

2006-07-26T07:04:00.000-07:00

Stop the Ride...I WANT OFF!!!

Here we go again....just when things SEEM to be calming down with my son, the frickin rollercoaster goes back to Full speed. I HATE this ride and I WANT OFF!!

I have been praying for the strength to get thru today, tonite & tomarrow....then at least we'll be on the road headed back to CA. Things got so bad again yesterday that I almost said "F*ck it-I cant take it anymore..Im leavin RIGHT NOW, take both of these boys back to CA, drop them off and come back alone. I'm DONE with being a Mom!!"
Thanks Shirley for "talkin me off the ledge"!!

Anyone that knows me ...knows I dont really mean that Im done bein a Mom, but Im sooooo close to that point right now that it scares me. I have NEVER been disrespected like this-not even by the scummy-ass inmates I worked with for 10 years...

Last nite the "Dynamic-frickin Duo" decided to sneak out when I went to bed...which was IT! I waited up, locked them out, called the PD & about ripped their frickin throats out when they came home. Im done. Finished. THROUGH! I told Blake he cant live with me if this is the way he wants to be. His reply? "You wont do that. Im everything to you. Im the reason youre in Arizona & if you kick me out or make me live somewhere else..you KNOW itll kill you. It AINT gunna happen. You know it & I know." I still dont know what stopped me from punchin him in his throat at that exact moment!! Thats the kinda shit Im dealin with right now.
How can I love someone so much and hate them at the same time???

2006-07-25T06:31:00.000-07:00

The Countdown is Onnnnnn......

This is gunna be a crazy-busy week, with so much to look forward to (and so much to do)!

*Tomarrow night is the 1st Event of my "Mini-Goals": The Darryl Worley Concert. As excited as Ive been to go-I ve been kinda second-guessing the idea the last 2 days. Im basically all set-have my backstage pass, have an idea of what Ill wear (no-cant afford anything new, so yall are gunna hafta see a "repeat" outfit-ughhh). The main concern-the shows in Tuscon which is 2 hrs away. I absloutley LOVE to drive and go to new places by myself, but for some reason Im kinda hesitant. Hmmmm....

*Thursday night I'll really see how much I LOVE driving..."I'm Goin Back to Cali..Cali..Cali..Goin Back to Cali..." (remember LLCool J's song?!) hahahaha-yeah Im old-school like 'dat!
Anyways...thatll be 12 hrs in the truck with 2 teenage boys-Funnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. Hopefully theyll sleep most of the way since we arent leavin Phx until 10-11 pm.
This is gunna sound bad-but I cant WAIT to have my apartment back to being MINE again!!(Vince is goin home and Im not sure if Blake is comin back to AZ with me or not this trip) Im to the point that Im TIRED of seeing "bodies" sprawled all over the couches, tired of spending $700/month on groceries (my normal bill is around 300) , tired of worrying about 2 kids (beleive me..Blake gives me enough to worry about all by himself-I dont need more!) & just tired of not bein able to walk around the house in my bra & panties / sports bra & shorts if I feel like it. Oh yeah..lets not forget- theres the electric bill that has gone up $75 this month and the cell bill which jumped an extra $50 too since having both Blake & Vince here. Fun times.

Ok..enough of the rant-back to the GOOD things! Im so excited to get back to CA and see SHIRLEY & CATHY!! Im so proud of Cathy & her success with her BFL program-she is doing AMAZING and I cant wait to see the changes in her! I cant wait to hang out with my bestest NASCAR Hooch-weve got plans to make for our big trip & I really need some "girl-time"!

*Saturday night we have our Annual Fundraiser Luau and Im hopin and prayin my Hawaiian dress is gunna look HOT on me!(My 2nd Mini-Goal) I havent seen any of my "hawaii-family" since last august (and 50+lbs ago) so Im excited about that too. Me & my SIL run the bar area ...we always have such a blast, and damn-did you know that a lil flirting can make you some big $$ in tips?! hahahahahaa Were a great team, and shes frickin HILARIOUS! There will be NO MaiTais for me though-strictly alcohol free (until Richmond!)

Unfortunately I have some dang RESPONSIBILITIES to handle before the fun starts. Gotta sign my lease, get my work done for when Ill be out of town, TAN, do laundry, take my baby Gracie to be boarded while Im gone and all the lil stuff that comes with being gone for 5 days. All in all-not too bad!

IM EXCITED!!!!!

2006-07-23T07:23:00.000-07:00

It's Sunday, so you know what that means....It's RACE DAY!!

Some of my girlfriends keep askin me WHY I watch NASCAR..Heres a few reasons :

2006-07-22T07:31:00.000-07:00

3 Week Progress Pics...

I can't say THANK YOU enough to Dede for keeping me 100% on track for the last 2 weeks! She's such an amazing friend, and she got me "Back To Basics" with eating 100% COMPLETELY CLEAN, and living BFL AS WRITTEN!! Plus, she is totally kickin ass with her own Challenge. I am soooo proud of you Girl!!
(She has an alterior motive ya'll--she wants to get me lookin my best so I can sweep a certain Nascar driver off his feet, get married and get her free lifetime passes to the Races!) Bwahahahahaha

A special thank you to Bubblz for puttin my pics side-by-side. You ROCK!

The befores were taken 4th of July, the new ones taken last night. Its so crazy for me to look at the pics & SEE changes becuz I honestly DON"T see ANY changes thru my own eyes. (Hmmm....something I definately need to work on.)

2006-07-21T07:08:00.000-07:00

Mindless Rambling & Scattered Thoughts....

Seems like I have alot of these lately!

* How can Johnny Depp make being dirty, having gold teeth, wearing dreadlocks and black eyeliner so DAMNNN SEXY???!! (I'd set sail with Cap'n Jack Sparrow ANYDAY!)
* Why do I keep having crazy dreams about men I dont even know?
* Why do I read Dede's & Shirley comments & Emails when Im drinkin coffee? I always end up laughing so hard it comes out my nose-ya think I'd learn by now!
* How in the hell can we have a Hail storm when its 112 degrees outside?
* Why do I decide to practice celibacy during a BFL Challenge? We all KNOW that the workouts, healthy food and clean living INCREASE our sex drive...UGGHHHH!!!!!!!
* When is my Eye-Candy gunna come back to the gym?? The last 2+ months just havent been the same with out him to "admire"
* Why do I get asked out on a constant basis when: Im already seeing someone or taking a break from dating....but when Im wantin to date-No such luck!
* Why does Muscle Armor taste soooo nasty?
* Does anyone ever get their Protein Powder to mix up to the point that there are no lil'
"protien-powder-islands" floating around in the glass?
* Why does my upper body tan so easily, but my legs take FOREVER to get dark?
* Damn... Elliott Sadler is sexy-as-hell...
* How can my cell phone go from 5 bars to zero bars & drop my calls when I dont even move?

* Why is almost everything on this list about M-E-N????????????

Damn Celibacy!!

2006-07-20T06:49:00.000-07:00

My Lil' Bundle of Sunshine

This is my Baby Gracie Lynn (all 5 lbs of her!)...She makes every morning such a joy & has truly turned me into a Morning Person. I can wake up grumpy, tired, bitchy-whatever, but there she is, stickin her adorable lil face out from under the covers to greet me-all wiggly, happy and ready to start the day. How in the world can I stay in a bad mood or grumpy when she is the 1st thing I see when I open my eyes? (Impossible!)

Ive only had her since April 30. (adopted her from the Min Pin Rescue in CA), but I cant believe the changes she has made in me in such a short time. Seriously-our morning "rituals" have made Mornings my favorite time of the day. I even look FORWARD to our 4:30 AM walks in the 94 degree weather....shes such a blessing!

As yall can see-she had a broken leg when I adopted her, but her cast was taken off 2 weeks ago and shes doin great adjusting to havin her leg back. Weve been workin on her social skills (I couldnt have her within 100 feet of people when I 1st got her becuz she was so afraid of everyone), and now she loves to be out & about with me, will let strangers come up to us and wants to play with everyone. And just in case you were wonderin'...YES, she IS spoiled!!

2006-07-18T06:21:00.000-07:00

Life Aint Always Beautiful, but its a Beautiful Ride....

I love that song by Gary Allan...its sooo true! I need to figure out how to put songs on here so yall can hear it.

Heres a few lines from it:

"Life aint always beautiful
Sometimes it's just plain hard
Life can knock you down, it can break your heart

Life aint always beautiful
You think you're on your way
And it's just a dead end road at the end of the day

But the struggles make me stronger
And the changes make me wise
And happiness has its own way of takin it's sweet time

CHORUS
No, life aint always beautiful
Tears will fall sometimes
Life aint always beautiful
But it's a beautiful ride

I'm ready to face a new day-be as strong as possible and make the most of it. No matter how bad things get..I need to remember: that I really am truly BLESSED. I have so many things in my life to be Grateful for...especially my friends!

A special THANK YOU to each and everyone of you for the thoughts, prayers and support yesterday. Yall got me thru the entire day WITHOUT Binging or turning to food to drown my emotions. YEAHHHH!!!

2006-07-17T15:08:00.000-07:00

Ready to give up....

I REALLY try to stay positive, but this post is about as far from positive as its gets-and Im sorry. I hafta get this out before I literally have a breakdown....and honestly I feel like I'm teetering on the edge of one as I type.

I'm at the end of my rope with my son. I dont know what else to do to help him-Ive tried EVERYTHING that I know how. I tried to give him a clean start here in AZ. I left everything and everyone back in CA just to save him from the gang, the drugs and a life of crime & all the shit that comes with it. It hasnt been the perfect move-but he has made progress in some aspects, but now he is backsliding to a point that I feel helpless.

I know for a fact that hes smokin weed on a daily basis-which I can NOT Tolerate! Now I found out hes done 'Shrooms within the last couple of days. Last night was the final straw-Blake lost his cell phone, so he asked to use mine for a minute. (Yes-he lied to me about who he was callin)Then at 1:00 frickin a.m. MY CELL rings-I answer it all "ghetto" cuz I dont recognize the #, and its his GawwddDammnn "Weedman!" I came un-fuckin glued! The dumb ass even TOLD me his name and asked if I was Blakes Bitch-"Yeah Mutha-f*cka..Im his Bitch..his Bitch-ass Momma!!" (Tha lil punk ass hung up on me.)

I tried to get some help from the local P.D. (i tried a few months ago too) but according to them, becuz Blake isnt on probation or diversion I cant force him into a rehab or a program. He has to go volutarily. Thats bullshit-Im his Mom, his legal guardian-the one thats responsible for him if he gets into trouble with the law-but I cant MAKE him get help. Also, they said that unless they find him in possession of a "substantial" amount of anything-its an Infraction in this district. They wont even come out & arrest him for being under the influence unless I can prove that he is in grave danger of hurting himself or someone else. As bad as shit was back home-at least I had the P.D. on my side.

I cant take seeing my son change into who he is becoming. He is my life-my heart and soul and I would lay down my life in a HEART BEAT for him! To see this mean, nasty, disrespectful young man in Blakes body is killing me....Honestly I dont know what to do at this point. He doesnt listen to me-Ive tried to contact his Dad, but I honestly dont think he will take custody of him. My parents cant take him either-they are in their 60's and already have my loser-drug-addicted 46 yr old brother livin with them.

I swear-my own lil piece of Desert heaven is more like a living hell right now.........

2006-07-17T07:12:00.000-07:00

(Deep Sighhhhhh....)

I had a pretty rough night, so I needed sumthin to brighten up my morning.

2006-07-16T21:17:00.000-07:00

Week In Review...

BFL:
I'm pretty happy with my week overall. Started out a lil shaky, but THANK YOU Dede for getting me focused & back on track from Wednesday morning on. Also gotta thank LisaMichele for the calls, support & ass kickin on Saturday.100% clean eating since Wed (except yesterday-Freeday)& today I even got back on the treadmill to run. Looking back-I probably SHOULDNT have with all the problems I have been having with my knee. I'm definately payin for it now...and Ill be stickin to the Elliptical or bike for HIIT this week. Im ready for another "perfect day" tomarrow!!

HOME:
A rollercoaster of a week. My lease is up on the 31st of this month. I planned on renewing it for 6 months, but due to the "punk-ass Neighbors" right below me...I spent 2 days out lookin at apts. I really love my neighborhood, its clean, quiet & one of the best areas in all of the Valley and how in the hell they were approved to live here is beyond me. These young wanna-be dope dealers/pimps were BREEDING Pit Bulls in the apt. Can U imagine having 5 adults, 3 kids, 2-90lb pit bulls & 6 puppies in a 2 bedroom apt?! I absolutley have zero-tolerance for punks like them. I spent 10 years dealin with low-lifes like that when I worked in the jail & thats the last thing I wanna deal with at my home.
Anyways-the good news....they got a 10 day moveout notice & it looks like theyre gone! WooHooo...hopefully Ill have my safe quiet lil corner of the earth back real soon! (And no moving until I leave AZ!) Yeahhh!

My bestest friend Kiara came thru last night-it was so good to see her and finally meet my lil 4-legged "niece" Minnie! Thats my girl-shes been my Sister ever since I lost Jen & I love her to death-Miss you Ki!

Me:
For those of you that dont know-Im on a "sabbatical" from Men and dating. So of course..I was asked out TWICE this week! Why does it always happen like that?! Oh well...I stayed strong, arent yall proud of me? Im fine with the whole "no dates/men thing" on the most part, but damnnnnnn-sometimes celibacy is a BITCH!!

NASCAR:
Talk about excitement!! No, not me when I see Elliott-even though I DO get VERY excited! LOL
Im talkin about the race. Well....exciting until the stupid thing went into overtime and my Man ran outta gas with less than 2 laps left. UGGGHHH!!!! Danggggg....so close to a top 5 finish, then ended up in 24th. I think I need to catch the red-eye to NC and go comfort him!

2006-07-16T08:39:00.000-07:00

Tagged.....

LisaMichele & Shirley both tagged me for this last week, so here it is:

Four Jobs I have had in my life:

1. Correctional Officer
2. Massage Therapist
3. Realtor
4. Child Care Coordinator (Inmates kids inside a state prison)

Four Movies I would watch over & over:

1. Pure Country
2. Christmas Story
3. Shawshank Redemption
4. Waiting To Exhale

Four Places I have lived:

1. Phoenix, AZ
2. Vacaville, CA
3. Santa Cruz, CA
4. ----------

Four TV Shows I love to watch:

1. Seinfeld
2. NASCAR
3. CSI (Vegas only)
4. Rescue Me

Four Places I have been on vacation:

1. Bahamas
2. Hawaii
3. Ensenada
4. Vegas

Four of my favorite foods:

1. Pizza
2. Watermelon
3. Seafood
4. Mexican Food

Four places I would rather be right now:

1. At the race (hangin out w/Shirley, Dede, Ed & Jim-bo)
2. At the beach
3. On a cruise
4. A BFL Get together

Four friends I have tagged that I think will respond:

1. No one-everyone else has already done this!
2. -------
3. -------
4. ------

Four most influential people in my life:

1. Mom & Pops
2. Jenifer (my sis)
3. Grannie
4. Blake

Four goals I wish to achieve in my lifetime:

1. Raise my Son to be a happy, healthy and productive Young Man
2. Be happy with myself/love myself
3. Help others to achieve a healthy/fit lifestyle
4. Find true love

2006-07-15T12:34:00.000-07:00

MY PERFECT DAY......

My girls Shirley & Dede got me thinkin about what my "perfect Day" would be like, so here it is!

My perfect day:
It would start early in the morning with a trip to Home Depot--(where I'd spend a few solid hours just "window shopping" & testing out the tools)--Ive been banned from doing any real shopping at that particular store, but its still fun to play around in there! (Hmmm....I wonder if it would be worth shopping at Lowes?)

Lets see, next I'd pick up a six pack at Office Depot-that should quench my thirst- as I spend the next few hours at Bass Pro Shops.

On my way home, Ill stop off and have a 'lil Coors Light, then end the perfect day, by crawling into bed, covered in candy and fall asleep with a mouthful of M&Ms. And of course, I'd wake up with melted candy all over me.....

2006-07-13T15:10:00.000-07:00

Since I need to figure out the picture-thing on here....

I thought I'd give y'all a lil summin-summin HOT to look at!

Here he is...My CRUSH, and YESSSS I've got it BADDDD!

Awwhhhh....
Don't we make a cute couple?

Only 57 days until Im face to face with this Hottie...Gawd Im nervous already!

2006-07-12T21:43:00.000-07:00

UUGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Sorry..Im just so frustrated right now! I have been trying to put pics into my post for the last hour & a half, and its still not workin' for me. WTF??

HELPPPPP!!

2006-07-11T17:37:00.000-07:00

Christmas in July!!!

Yep..Its 112 degrees outside, but Christmas came a few months early to this girly!! Yesterday when I got home, "Santa" -aka-The Mailman had my mailbox packed with GOODIES!! AWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Lets see, 1st, I finally got the confirmation paperwork from my Workers Comp Atty-And my final pay off is being processed ($$$!!) Y'all just dont know-this has been a long drag out fight for the past 5 years, and even though Im only gettin 25% of what I was originally awarded-its finally almost over!

Next envelope: MY Darryl Worley BACKSTAGE PASS!! Just in time to go see him in Tucson on the 26th & again in CA on the 31st. Darryl has been one of my favorite singers ever since the 1st time I met him about 7 years ago. Hes tall, sexy and always so sweet, and last time I seen him he actually REMEMBERED me! He asked me why was I in AZ when I live in CA! (Me and my Girl Heidi spent the evening gambling with him in CA one night & he totally remembered everything about it) Yeah-I was feelin KINDA special!! hehe

Next: Got a big ol' envelope from my TRUE CRUSH--ELLIOTT SADLER!! (Ok, so what if it was something I ordered from his website.) The lil slip the mailman left me said "To: Dana **** Sender: Elliott Sadler!" Yes-I did call up Shirley and tell her all about it..Im a goofball like that! Hell, I even took a pic of the slip at the post office before I turned it in! BWHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!

And last but definately NOT least..(drum roll please!)
My tickets to Richmond International Raceway came in!! Thats right -NASCAR BAY-BEEEEEEEEEE!!

OMG....Girls-only trip to Richmond VA for 'da races (Busch AND Cup) and a lil extra excitement Ill write about later!!

Now I SERIOUSLY need to get focused on my Challenge so I can look "SMOKE"-N HOTT for the trip! (Had to throw that in there for You Dede!)

2006-07-09T17:29:00.000-07:00

I'm FINALLY here!

Ok...since I promised I'd get started, here I am. Still don't have the hang of all of this-so bear with me....it's gunna be pretty bare and boring for awhile!